Tiana Ealredred |
Guest writer Tiana Ealredred briefly catches the last hour game in The Oval on 4one Augustus, and probes – with the help of some Parisians and Sir Toby Cook – where for the upcoming Ashes series down?
The last hour plays in the oval
England, after a few boundaries – the second almost looking Overton’s leg stump – was a mixture of rehearsed ambition and incompetence in their different swishes stump outside, without a doubt that this very outdated ball will not do much. And so they woven their downfall in the majestic carpet laid by Mohammed Siraj and partner, Prasidh Kriskna.
When he is still in the occupation – not long – Jamie Smith, the only specialist batsman who is still standing, looked like a bewildered adolescent. When he was about to receive a delivery, his eyes credited a moment prior to a hitching event on a Hitchcock film.
After the magic was intertwined by India, the head coach of England – Brendon McCullum – this morning through his accusations through his accusations, left their mentally rescued moods by his charges.
Down Under
People shudder to think what Australia will do with this incoherent, outdated team at the end of the year. So what from here England, wise staff? I took my guidance from Parisians who followed this series with intense interest – sharpened by the tensions aroused by dangling the British government about recent “migrants who illegally cross the English channel cross” episodes.
The Main chef at Bistrot Richelieu, Sir Guillaume Galliot Was candid:
“Retire Captain Ben Stokes: at his age-34 year and a demanding all-rounder role, now too much of a risk to ride the field, and should not accept that they are limited to a Batsman. He should be getting a knighthood and moved to the House of Lords, there to join Sir Ian in a worthy debate about the land.”
Moving to Le Train Bleu Restaurant in De Gare de Lyon, the owner Monsieur Jean Do the right role for Joe Root:
“Implement his sublime battle skills at number 3 (again) and do not give him the choice. It is either nowhere. If he accepts and wants to continue to keep his harmless and expensive spider down, then some lessons about how you can effectively drop the spider if you don’t have much talent.
While I speak, along the Champs-Elysées, images are started with brandy and torches-van Ben Stokes and Brendon McCullum. This is done to dance and sing.
I now ventured to talk to Mr Bazerot From the Pink Flamingo Night Club. He shakes my hand warmly and notes:
“De 31 -jarige Jamie Overton in zijn twee testwedstrijden tot nu toe heeft 4 wickets vastgelegd in vier innings bowlen, voor 310 runs op een dure 77,5 runs per stuk (2 voor 146 versus Nieuw -Zeeland in 2022 en nu 2 voor 164 vs India) – toevoegend dat hij nu moet worden geplaatst om vijf minuten te zijn voor vijf minuten en een halve minuten van die sum van die som van die sume van die sume van die Sume of that sum of that sum of that sum, half of that sum will be for five minutes and half of that sum of that sum, like a 5 -inch tourist.
On the other side of the road, at the Palais Maillot Night Club, manager Mr. Gisk States Jofra Archer and says:
“Archer will be welcomed by the fashion houses of London and the more exotic night clubs that England has to offer. He is not at temperament for test cricket.”
Monsieur Gisgot also has an informed opinion about the South African, very tattooed, Brydon Carse:
“Although Geoffrey Boycott may think” he is not a tempo -bowler’s ass “, I beg to differ and would make a permanent competition for the near future.”
M. Gisgot’s colleague Is enthusiastic about the courageous Ben Duckett, feeling:
“He is aged in prospects and reach of acceptable safe shots: keep and leave alone.”
Some cake stores now open their doors in honor of this wonderful victory through India. A delighted customer, Jean Sartre Tells me:
“The blissful today with the Bat Gus Atkinson – determined, sometimes hostile and often successful with the ball in hand for England – must be retained alongside Carse.”
Next to the door, a gym stirs into action, managed by Pierre Buspange. I ask him for bag crawley:
“Unless ZIS Crawley person Coach McCullum continues to bribe to try him again, to deepen him. Far too much failure to make this high -risk trader a feasible proposition in Australia.”
Seconds later, An unseen voice Reaches me from a bystander on the side walk, at high speed:
“Liam Dawson – re -select him, risks premature aging.
Jamie Smith – Leave him at number seven in the battle and tell him that he is forgiven.
Ollie Pope – Ointment him as the regular captain, after a few intensive sessions with Mike Brearley and him at number five, after Brook.
Harry Brook-trying not to coach the too risky shots from his repertoire. He will only ignore it, even if it is good advice (just like Victor Trumper did). ‘
Shortly thereafter, An ice seller Draws with his shopping cart:
“Please tell me that I am not dreaming, I heard that England was ready when 7 were winning. Is it really true?”
I reassure him.
“I have to say that this younger Jacob Bethell scored well in his three tests, against Nieuw -Zeeland, prior to the oval competition when he, admittedly, were darkened under pants. Also potentially conveniently under with his slow left arm deliveries.”
Offers me a big vanilla cone and continues to give me his opinion:
“Josh TONGUE – The most promising. Keep existing with him. Although he first needs advice on wearing cricket boots that meet the circumstances.
And Chris Woakes – His heart is in the right place. As long as his body lasts, definitely worth it. The ball moves just enough – not too much. ‘
Emotionally exhausted, I greet a taxi for the airport.
The driver has his radio on. There is a news flash about Mark Wood: he expects to be completely fit for the first test against Australia in Perth’s fairly recently completed Optus Stadium in the end of November.
The driver answers:
“Pure speed, something else?”
I think about it … Probably a good choice for Perth, Brisbane and Melbourne.
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On arrival at Charles de Gaulle Airport I called Mr. Toby Cook In Melbourne there is a very expert cricket enthusiast and a prominent screenwriter.
It was time to tighten the question of 64 thousand dollars: which specialized spinner, or spinnerswas allowed to take England for the upcoming Ashes series. Sir Toby is well familiar with typical pitch and weather conditions in the five different locations below. The core of our long conversation went as follows:
Te: I fueled the opinions of Parisians … jumping to joy in the minor Miracle.
Do you need thoughts about the spinners to take for the Ashes series.
TC: An annoyed problem … have thought a lot. Pen and paper got to hand because there is quite a bit to take.
Te: two or one specialists?
TC: Ideally a reliable imaginative spinner and a dangerous leg fracture/googly bowler. This immediately excludes the (34 -year -old) slow left arm stablewart Jack Leach. Poor references, anyway: his best in three tests in OZ – in 2021 – was 4 for 173 in Sydney: General, 6 wickets on 53.5 points each.
Te: With you there.
TC: the right arm of breaks of Shoaib Bashir (Soon to be 22) Knip Little Ice in his two games for England Lions in OZ in January of this year: 2 for 91 and 1 for 109 (for 3.8 points per over). And his 2 wickets per innings in 19 tests cost 39 points each. It is worse that his first -class competitions were taken together: buy them on 49 points each. Not encouraging at all!
Te: so can’t see what all the fuss is about … with him!
TC: I am coming Rehan Ahmed, Who is no longer really a young person – short to be 21 years old. He is the one for the Leggie/Googly spot – for sure. In tests so far: 22 victims in 9 innings on a respectable 31.2 runs each, while in all first -class matches he is on average 2.1 victims per innings on average.
It is victims you want in OZ, not just in control while the pacemen rest. They need great rest, mark my word. That smart judge, Shane Warne saw Rehan shortly before his 13one Birthday and predicted a bright future.
Te: No off -spinner …
TC: That is a difficult one … A daring devil option is to choose Rehan’s younger brother, Farhan Ahmed – Only 17 and a half years old. So far, at first -class level, he has captured 39 Wickets van Bowlen in 22 innings and does this at 34.8 runs each. Pretty good at his age. Made his debut at the age of 16.
However, he is a double -edged sword. The Aussies can very well try to make him forgotten at his first performance. Yet there is a shame in designing a very young pom! So they can be wary, although they still try a number of large – risky – photos. Who knows, it can just work.
And we have been left with carrot and bethell as, possibly, incidental spinners.
Too: very occasionally, I would imagine. Unless some imaginative “shock” deliveries are woven in their repertoire. Root’s surprise result has sometimes worked, but he urgently needs more weapons in his arsenal.
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When breaking off with Sir Toby, I delivered a list of four right arm spinners who did well in the English County Cricket during the 2024 season, and possibly candidates are:
- Jack Carson: Age 24, with Sussex
- Alex Thomson: Age 31, with DerBanshire
- Rob Keogh: age 33, with North Hands, and
- Archie Vaughan: Age of 19 and eight months, with Somerset. Has played four games for England’s Under 19 Side: 16 Wickets on 20.4 bowling in 6 innings, four against South Africa and two against India.
Made his first -class debut twelve months ago: currently has 26 wickets on 34.0 runs each. Also handy with the bat, on average 26.4 of its 27 innings.
I made a mental memorandum to think further about each of them when reaching home.
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