Perfection of pocket rocket | Six of the best

When an AMG GT weighs 2.1 tonnes and a 911 GTS with a few options can easily reach £150,000, some light relief (of whatever kind) is in order. So that’s exactly what it says here. No car here weighs meaningfully more than a tonne, they all cost less than £10,000, they’re all manual, and together they have less than 700bhp. Perfect – there’s no fun like a great junior hot hatch. The ZC33S Swift Sport is a perfect example of this breed, with just 140 hp and 975 kg to its name. When new it received some criticism for being more expensive than the naturally aspirated version that came before it; but soon after, Suzuki made the Sport hybrid and then ditched it altogether, so now the 50mpg/130mph combination looks more appealing than ever before. This one in particular; Although it’s a British market car, it’s been treated to all sorts of goodies from Japan, including Tein springs, an HKS Racing suction kit and an R’s Racing anti-roll bar. It promises to be highly recommended, but also suitable for everyday use – and it is not much more than half the new price…

Yes, this could be a nice Cooper S given the budget. And yes, Coopers are meant to be at their best on smaller wheels. It’s probably also fair to say that these early R50s will never be as loved as the originals – or perhaps some of the others on this list. But as a celebration of everything that was great about the 21st century reimagining of the Mini, this thing seems like it’s just the thing. It still shines bright red, the white accents are smart and the big wheels on each corner ensure that the Cooper still has a sporty stance. This one is also interesting because it is one of the very first R50s completed in July 2001 and registered on September 7 of that year. So yes, these are almost 25 years old. A real classic Mini, and at £5,000, the cheapest car here. First time for anything with a Mini…

The French are the masters in making fast cars small, light and agile. For decades, there’s been little sensation like a little Gallic hatch, powered by a punchy 16-valve and held together by what feels like Meccano. Some of the very best are now popular in the classic market – see the Clio Williams and Trophy for proof. But cheaper, equally hilarious versions of the French formula are certainly still out there. £10,000 may not be far off the new price of a VTS, although numbers of 16-valve Saxos crumbled faster than the boys’ magazines as their oversteered nature caught exuberant drivers. If you can find a pre-facelift VTS, keep it safe; even this one, a later Saxo that is fortunately free of modifications, looks worth cherishing with less than 80,000 kilometers on the odometer. A glorious reminder of how simple hot hatches can be. Be sharp…

There are forgotten fast Fords, and then there is the Fiesta Zetec S. This was the sporty version before STs and the like existed, but it wasn’t that fast: presumably afraid of cannibalizing Puma sales, the Fiesta was equipped with the 102 hp 1.6 instead of the Yamaha-developed 125 hp 1.7. The chassis was of course a delight, because this was the Ford of the turn of the millennium: nimble, smooth, communicative and controlled. But the Zetec S always felt like a ‘what if’ kind of fast Ford, and many were donors for punchier engine swaps or race cars. Before you even think about the dreaded rust. So this Imperial Blue example is a real treat, retaining the standard engine and with a fortune spent making the rest of the Fiesta as good as it can be: Racing Puma seats, coilovers, better brakes, extra reinforcement and so on. It is not sealed, comes with many spare parts and is clearly well loved. Parties couldn’t be much more fantastic.

Sometimes the old days aren’t as good as you remember, but sometimes they are. Take a look at the four previous entrants for proof: they were all registered in 2000 or 2001 and all offer spirited performance and genuine driving fun without going crazy. The Mini had the style, the Saxo had the speed, the Fiesta had the chassis. Then there was the Lupo, the mini GTI of the group. The design was cool and bright, the interior of another dimension and the driving experience perhaps not as boring as some others. However, that will be by early 2000s wild child standards; don’t be surprised if a quarter of a century later this feels back to basics in the best possible way. And still eminently usable in a way that a Saxo VTS may no longer be. This car from PH Auctions has a low mileage, has a Scorpion rear cabinet (long live the center exhaust!) and comes with almost a year of advice-free MOT to its name. Bidding starts next week.

Oh boy, they really don’t make them like they used to. The Panda 100HP used the time-honored recipe for so many great pocket rockets: it was lower, stiffer and faster than stock, better to look at and not much more expensive. At £9,995 in the mid-2000s, the Panda looked like the bargain of the century, retaining all the standard automotive usability while adding some fire in its belly (quite literally) thanks to the fitment of the 1.4-litre 16-valve Fiat Integrated Robotised Engine. With a six-speed manual gearbox as standard, the 100bhp could sprint to 60mph in around nine seconds and would happily be thrown into any corner thanks to the wider tyres, bigger brakes and firmer suspension. This one might need a bit of recommissioning as it’s been without an MOT for a few years, but it’s also a one-owner, 50,000 mile example. And you probably don’t need to tell us that there are very few of them left.