What is a very sensitive person?

Ann always knew she felt things deeper than most people.

She was always ashamed easily, cried quickly and felt overwhelmed in busy places. “As a child I was called ‘too sensitive’, a ‘crybaby’ and ‘thin skin,’ said Ann. As a result, she often felt insufficient and an” inappropriate amount of shame “.

Nowadays Ann, now 63, would be described as a very sensitive person (HSP), a term devised in 1996 by psychologist Elaine Aron, Ph.D., bestseller author of The very sensitive person and dozens of scientific studies On HSPs.

As is apparent from hundreds of research studies, HSPs – which include up to 20% of the population – things unique, especially when it comes to perception, emotions and empathy.

Licensed clinical psychologist Mary Kate Roohan, Psydwho specializes in working with very sensitive people, described an HSP as a person who takes the world into the world – both positive and negative – deeper. “It’s like having a brain that pays extra attention to the subtleties in their environment,” she said.

Features of very sensitive people

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Psychological Disorders (DSM-5)“Used by clinics and researchers to diagnose mental disorders, it does not classify as an HSP as a mental disorder or disorder. Instead, experts say they are very sensitive people high in a normal congenital personality characteristicKnown as sensory sensitivity (SPS).

Most people are sensitive to a certain extent, but HSPs are particularly sensitive. One of the many characteristics of a very sensitive person is that they are more influenced by their environment, especially in childhood. Just like Ann, they are often told that they cannot take criticism or that they have to grow thicker skin.

In addition to the sensitivity to criticism and feedback, HSPs are easily influenced by triggers in their physical environment. For example, bright lights and sounds, violence on TV or a clothing label that feels like sandpaper can be overwhelming for an HSP.

An HSP must take their time or multi-tasking can be particularly stressful. With a nervous system that works in overdrive, very sensitive people can feel overwhelmed and exhausted, which often needs downtime to charge. For example, they can leave a social environment early or have to complete a task in loneliness to concentrate better.

HSPs are also very sensitive to the dispositions of others, who often absorb the mood of another, which can be emotionally tiring. And although it seems that all HSPs would be introverted people, that is not the case: a maximum of 3 out of 10 are extroverted people, according to Roohan. “This makes sense, because HSPs often value connection and community,” she said.

Because of their deep sensitivity and stronger tendency to process emotions and reactions, a very sensitive person can be more susceptible to depression and fear, according to one 2023 Study. Fortunately, Aron said with sufficient family and community support at a young age that HSPs can function extremely well. But without a good start they are easily stressed and find it more difficult to cope.

Dealing with a very sensitive person

Being an HSP can be a power, but it can also be a challenge. To cope with high sensitivity, Aron proposes to reformulate your past and to concentrate on the positive aspects of the property. It is also important to understand what you need and to give yourself grace. For example, take as much time as possible if you can make a decision and then resist if you make a decision that is not possible.

Try to mention your needs without shame or hesitation. Roohan said: “I tell my customers that the majority of the population is not HSPs, and people do not often understand them. If there is enough relationship in the relationship, there are ways to articulate against someone you hold why what they say is harmful.”

In addition to clearly communicating your needs, it is a good idea to try to spend time with other HSPs. According to Aron, this connection can help reinforce that the property is real and you help you feel understood and heard.

Support a very sensitive person

In the way you would support other friends or family, it can be useful to ask an HSP what they need and then try to accommodate. For example, keep in mind that certain things in the environment can really influence them, so dim the lights or reject the music if they feel overstimulated. Also understand that HSPs need downtime, and it is not a reflection of how they think about you.

The good news is that research shows that couples with one or more partner who are an HSP get more out of marital counseling and communication training – so it can be useful to participate if you need it.

Being a very sensitive person can be a force

Although an HSP is associated with higher levels of stress, anxiety and depression and can interfere with daily activities, HSP’s have unique neurological wiring with which they have more noticeable and respond to their environment.

According to Aron, very sensitive people are often very creative and have a rich and complex inner life. Studies, including one MRI study That looked at HSPs as they viewed facial expressions have shown that HSPs have increased brain activity in areas that relate to empathy, action planning and consciousness.

These unique features, including improved processing perception and empathy, make it easy for them to connect with others. As a result, they often make large leaders.

HSPs also do well independent, and they are very competent, so that they can succeed almost everything.

Ann, a mother of three who thinks part of her work career as a teaching assistant, reflects the other benefits of an HSP. “I absolutely think I am an HSP, a better mother and a better teacher. Being extremely patient and analytical to me was able to get into the heads of children and feel what they may feel.”

*First name is only used for privacy.