“Embrace the sucking.”
One of the first things you learn as a marine is “embracing the sucking”. Not because it sounds hard – but because it is how power is forged. In today’s world, where convenience is glorified, we must remember this truth: real strength comes out of the fight.
Before I became a leadership coach and positive psychology expert, I was an American officer of Marine Corps. I quickly learned that discomfort is not a barrier for success – it’s the way to it. And that truth still leads everything I do.
You do not build up strength by avoiding discomfort. You build it by searching.
We live in a world where convenience is glorified – but that chase costs us our lead. Discomfort can feel awkward at the moment, but it is the only thing that really builds trust, grit and growth.
Earning the title of Marine in the United States
At the age of 18 I flew from Minnesota to San Diego to start Naval Rotc, nervous and wearing an outfit that I thought would make an impression: hot pink polka-dot shorts, matching pumps and a fresh manicure. Within a few hours a senior candidate looked over me and said, “You will never make it as a marine.”
Part of me believed him.
I struggled. I couldn’t keep track of the runs. I felt out of place. The only other female candidate stopped. I was alone – and hardly satisfied.
But I didn’t stop. I showed up, failed, continued. And three years later I graduated from the officer candidate school as the best Finisher in my university.
That experience has taught me something that is more relevant today than ever – especially in a world of uncertainty, pressure and burn -out: search day after day discomfort, and it will transform you. You don’t feel strong in the beginning. But with every mile, every decision and every refusal to stop – you build it.
This is what Grit looks like. And in the end it changes who you are.
What science says about discomfort
Positive psychology research supports this.
Studies show that well-being is not due to the avoidance of battle but of meaning, involvement and performance, all of which require effort and discomfort. Research also confirms that grit – not talent – is what distinguishes high performers. And neuroscience reveals that repeated efforts under challenge help the brain to adapt and become stronger.
The Marine Corps taught me that long before I had the science to prove it.
Daily deeds of discomfort
You don’t need a battlefield to build up strength. Some of the most powerful moments of growth happen in daily life:
- Tell the truth when silence feels safer
- Ask for help if you prefer to handle it
- Speak when your heart pounds
- Requesting that stretch assignment, although it is scary
These are not dramatic, but they determine. They may not earn medals – but they build something more important:
A life that you respect. A spirit that does not fold under pressure. The type of grit that becomes far too rare.
Every time you lean in inconvenience instead of not assuming it, you expand what you think you are capable of. You grind your edge. You build mental muscles.
The power of repetitions
Marines do not build trust in through motivating speeches. We build it by representatives.
Cold. Muddy. Repetitive. Uncomfortable.
But that is precisely the point: strength is not forged at a single decisive moment. It was built by small, repeated acts – day after day, representative after representative.
It is just like building a muscle.
You don’t get stronger by doing what is easy. You become stronger by lifting a little more weight, pushing another representative and appearing when it would be easier not to do that. If you can’t do anything today, it doesn’t mean you’ll never do that. It just means that you have not done enough repetitions – anyway.
Every time you opt for inconvenience instead of convenience, you train your mind as if you were training your body. That is how growth works – physically, mentally and emotionally.
This is what Marines mean when we say, “Embrace the sucking.” You don’t avoid the hard things. You always see it face – until one day what it used to feel impossible to feel like strength.
That is also what grit is.
Psychologist Angela Duckworth defines Grit as “passion and perseverance for long -term goals.” No talent. No luck. Only the ability to continue – especially when it is difficult, especially when it is slow.
And that’s good news. Because it means that everyone can build it.
You just have to do the representatives.
Four ways to build strength today
- Choose a meaningful challenge: What is an uncomfortable thing that you have avoided – but know that could lead to something great? Don’t wait until fear disappears. Let it guide you.
- Start small, start now: Don’t wait until you feel ready. Take an action today – Set the e -mail, speak, take the first step. Confidence is growing from action.
- Expected inconvenience: Growth comes with struggle. If it feels hard, it is not failing – it’s progress. That discomfort is where power is built.
- Celebrate the effort: Don’t wait for a finish line to be proud. Recognize your consistency and courage. Most people stop when it is difficult. You want.
A final thought
The Marine Corps taught me to run to the hard things – not because I was fearless, but because the growth on the other side of challenge lives.
So the next time you are tempted to take the easy route, ask yourself: Is this my representative today? Is this where I get stronger?
If the answer is yes – lean in it. Do it difficult.
Because comfort does not build character. Challenge.
#lesson #learned #Marines #succeed #work