What’s going on, freaks and nerds?
I don’t really think you’re a freak or a nerd; it just felt good to write.
What doesn’t feel good is seeing Nottingham Forest and that monster, Sean Dyche, try to rip up Zinchenko’s contract and send him back to Arsenal in January.
Doesn’t this move feel like a 60s East End dad walking in on his son practicing Freddie Mercury tunes in the mirror?
“We won’t have that malarkey in my house; go into the garden and shovel some gravel.’
Dyche cannot tolerate artistry in his dressing room. The idea of an ‘inverter’ repulses him. The way Roy Keane sees it and the Arsenal player doing things he used to do as a player… it just has no place in this modern world and needs to be destroyed.
Zinchenko was not in the squad for the match against West Ham, having scored 99 minutes in the previous four Forest defeats. He was also pulled into the match against Wrexham at half-time, presumably because Dyche thought he was late. Managers like Dyche need a head on a stick to show the pretty boys who’s boss. I think he had a big falling out with DCL at Everton because the player got annoyed at having to keep heading the ball in training – so he started scoring with his shoulders (nothing to do with him wearing a skirt on the front of a magazine of course).
Zinchenko should come home, sit on our bench, drop in some wonderful seven-minute cameos for Arsenal, or give us one of his great four-game stretches before he gets injured.
Whatever’s going on, knowing he’s in danger every day and playing under a manager so untrendy that he was briefly the trendiest manager in the league a few months ago… where am I with this line? Oh yeah, take Zinchenko home.
I’m having a bit of a problem with the whole Nottingham Forest saga. They were doing well under Nuno until the owner went mad on the final day of last season when Forest lost their chance at UCL football. Then they tried Ange, and it was a catastrophic disaster; now they’re working with one of the roughest joy destroyers in the game, and it’s not really that good to look at.
In the last ten games they have won four and lost six. They are boom or bust on a grand scale. They can beat Liverpool 3-0 or lose to Everton by the same score. Last season they were chasing the top 4; now they are one place above relegation. What do I achieve here? This won’t be an easy match if you’re not at home. That’s not based on an electric form like Bournemouth, because the stats show they take a point per home and away game… more that Arsenal have just played a big emotional away day in the cup, and they’ve had nine days to prepare against us after that awful Wrexham performance.
Sean Dyche hates what Arsenal stands for: if Arsenal’s Ultras organized a fight on Facebook groups, Sean would jot down the details in case he felt like it. He’ll fire up his team just like your dad after watching a GB News segment about non-binary farm animals… you won’t believe how incredulous that team talk will be.
If we show up half-baked and give in early, it’s going to be a nasty afternoon of rough stuff, long balls and deep, dirty, frustrating center blocks. Any plonkers who discover this is a refinement may end up in the trash; this must be cynicism… and I just find it hilarious that Edu has given up the comfort of Arteta football and the prestige of Arsenal to have to sit in a conference room with someone who gets angry at the frivolity of Pret A Manger pastries.
‘It’s a London company, Sean. They are London pastries. I promise.’
I would like to put gloves on Forest. Getting three points against them is a good build-up heading into a United game that would be all United theirs to win… and then lose six in a row. The Carrick bounce could be real as they have a lot of good players who can create magical moments. We need some cushion going into that game, and we can’t let our league form dip because of a post-cup hangover.
It was interesting to read that United have made the most of the FA Cup by booking a £10 million friendly in Saudi Arabia… which could potentially put Ronaldo in hot water to face his old club.
Wait a minute? Do you want to know what the prize money is for the Carabao Cup? £100,000.
The FA Cup? £2.1 million.
Crazy, right? United are doing the right business by being very bad at football at the moment.
Last part of the blog… what are the Gyok heads playing with right now? Taylor Swift fans, the Swifties, are crazy, but the Gyok heads are now online slandering our best player for not passing on him? Saka is the problem now? We’re in the Rashford phase of ‘we just need Saka to trust him more to unlock his super stardom’?
I’m getting so bad at people on my messaging apps trying to say he wasn’t bought for goals, despite the player saying so last night.
“That’s what I have to do, but I’ll do it more often.”
Gyokeres is not bait. The idea of signing Europe’s most prolific striker was, categorically, to score goals.
It’s weird, dude. If you’re slamming our best player for not doing enough for an underperforming striker, you should delete the apps and go for a walk. It’s terrible to see how these radical cliques form online and cause these kinds of problems.
For a little levity…I read this The Athletics about Wenger and his IDGAF era at FIFA, which established the rules of the game.
Wenger has also suggested legalizing corners that bend out of play and then drift back in, which seems like an incredibly niche problem in the first place, and again, who benefits from this? Those teams that want to ‘get it in the mixer’ and challenge the goalkeeper in the air.
Do you know why you are not taken seriously when you say such crazy things? Because you are not Arsène Wenger. I’m here for it. All day. Most of us just hope that in our final years we can get away with being rude and belligerent with no contact…this is really where I want to be. Imposing my will on billions of people with crazy things like this.
Alright my friends, that brings us to the end of the blog. Thanks for reading, check out the excellent Sam Dean podcast with Jacobs. I’ll do a bit of ‘Before the Whistle’ later – maybe solo as it’s been a crazy week of pods and the reception was good for the solo last time. Check out Sam below.
#DYCHE #POINTS #ROBBEN #RICH