Transitions in aged care: why families struggle with decisions – realestate.com.au

Moving a parent or loved one into elder care can be difficult.

There’s the whole emotional side of things where you’ve had to come to the realization that they’ve reached a point where their current living situation isn’t enough to keep them safe and meet their needs.

Then there are the enormous logistical challenges of finding the right facility for them, and packing up and selling their belongings, which may have been that way for decades.

Bob Morton, co-founder and CEO of the Property Clearance Company – Australia’s leading home clearance service – said at this time of year many will realize that the time has come for their loved ones to move on to the next phase of their lives and make difficult and stressful decisions about how to facilitate that.

“Families are often overwhelmed by the emotional weight of the decision, the logistics, the time pressure and the fear of getting it wrong,” he said.

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“What we see every day is grief mixed with guilt, exhaustion and uncertainty, all happening at the same time. At this time of year, when family members are catching up with older loved ones and realizing that the need to move them into supportive living, such as retirement or aged care, is critical, the decision and its impact can be extremely difficult.”

Having good information can take some of the stress out of transferring someone to aged care.

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Mr Morton said the process was particularly difficult for those clearing an old family home.

“People walk into rooms full of memories and suddenly have to make quick decisions,” he said.

“What stays, what goes, what is important and what is not. That is extremely difficult when emotions are already running high.”

Mr Morton said that while these decisions often need to be made in a timely manner, where possible people should try not to rush them.

“Outsourcing the physical work of sorting, cleaning up, selling or donating items can take away a huge emotional burden,” he says.

Moving a loved one to elderly care can be confronting.

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“It allows families to focus on their loved one, and not on the chaos around them.

“With the right approach, patience and support, families can navigate this transition with compassion, clarity and much less emotional strain.

“It’s about honoring the past while making room for the next chapter.”

A report by the Retirement Living Council found that more than 120,000 South Aussies over the age of 75 were living in homes that were unsuitably sized, and that putting them in a retirement home or aged care facility would save the government $1 billion a year due to reduced interaction with our already strained healthcare system.

Daniel Gannon – Executive Director of the Retirement Living Council. Photo Jeremy Piper/New Romans

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It showed that getting older Australians out of their homes and into more suitable housing would free up our hospitals due to fewer slips, trips and falls, and could be the ‘secret weapon’ to inject more equity into the market, reducing the housing crisis.

RLC executive director Daniel Gannon said last year the superannuation system needed reform, which would help free up more homes for Australian house hunters and make it easier for people to upsize, reduce debt and free up equity.

“People are buying later and retiring later, which means the system has to catch up,” he said.

“We need a modern approach to retirement that reflects how Australians actually live today.”

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A simple checklist for moving a loved one into aged care

1. Recognize the emotional impact

This transition is emotionally complex for everyone involved.

Talk openly about the move.

Listen without rushing or downplaying feelings.

Reassure your loved one that they are supported.

2. Involve your loved one in decisions

Maintaining dignity and freedom of choice reduces stress.

Ask which possessions are most important.

Involve them in selecting items for their new room.

3. First contact the elderly care institution

Each facility has guidelines on what can and cannot be brought in.

Confirm the limits for furniture and personal items.

Ask about safety, space and electrical limitations.

Make it clear what the facility already offers.

4. Sort items slowly and carefully

Time pressure often leads to regret.

Start early and work one area at a time.

Separate sentimental items before practical items.

5. Preserve memories and family history

These moments are easily lost during hasty cleanups.

Photograph meaningful items.

Label souvenirs with names, dates or stories.

6. Make sure the new space feels familiar

Familiarity provides comfort during change.

Take photos, favorite objects or soft furnishings with you.

Add familiar routines, books or music.

7. Seek professional support

You don’t have to arrange this alone.

Hire professionals who have experience sorting, packing and decluttering homes.

Also discuss the inclusion of cataloging, valuing, and selling items.

Also investigate the need for them to clean the property and prepare it for sale.