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div>I feel left out. Outside life, as it were, although you are actually as inside as you can be, back in a new life. I know this period will pass. When you are no longer at home with a small child who needs constant care. When the little baby is a bit bigger and you really start working again. And the other life, the life you had before, slowly but surely creeps back, but in a new way.
I know it is. Yet it’s so hard to just be in this right now and enjoy it. I try to cuddle with Joni and Max as much as possible and remind myself that this time is only now and that of course I like to spend a lot of time with them. But I am also someone who likes to receive terribly done, feels good to be able to create everything. And right now the projects are just loose threads and nonsense everywhere. Along with lost socks and crumbs.
It reminds me that you can have two thoughts in your head at the same time. That you can’t like the first baby period even though it is so cuddly. That you must find it difficult not to have family nearby or someone to babysit. Really wanting to go back to work and have your little one at home at the same time.
I feel like I’m losing out work-wise if I don’t deliver something and be up to date. When I’m not updating, showing new works and having exhibitions. While I know that this time is only now when he is so little, and that I can make up for everything else later.
We continue to balance <3