I use ChatGPT and othersAI toolsrecently for quite a few things. A few examples:
- Working on strategy and business operations for my latest venture,Magic of the life story.
- Planning how to get the most value out of the Epic ski pass I purchased for this year while balancing everything else.
- Putting together a stretching and DIY physical therapy plan to help my shoulders feel better during workouts at the gym.
Along the way, I did what I think many AI power users end up doing: I went into the personalization and settings and told the chatbot to be neutral, direct, and just the facts.
I don’t want a chatbot that says, “That’s a brilliant idea!” every time I explore an adjustment to my business strategy. Not all of them are brilliant, I assure you.
And I don’t want a lecture about how, if I really have shoulder problems, I should go to a ‘real’ physiotherapist. I’m an adult. I don’t outsource my judgment to a robot.
“Stop. I didn’t ask you that.”
The result of all this is that I have developed an alpha relationship with AI.
I tell him what to do. If it takes too long, if it assumes I agree with its suggestions, or if it starts padding its answers with unnecessary niceties, I’ll shut it down.
- “Stop it. I didn’t ask you that.”
- “No. Wrong. Listen to what I say before you answer.”
- “All I need from you are the following three things. Nothing else.”
As ChatGPT itself repeatedly reminds me, it has no feelings. Here, I even asked for confirmation while writing this article:
I have no feelings and I cannot be offended. You can be blunt, curt, or even rude to a chatbot and nothing will be harmed.
The awkwardness you describe is entirely related to the human side of the interaction.
All good, right? Until I caught myself dealing with itcustomer service.
$800 to Warby Parker
Recently I returned most of ita large Warby Parker order– probably close to $600 of the $800 I spent on glasses, spread across multiple orders placed on different days last month.
I always try to remember that customer service representatives are real people, who often work the opposite schedule so they can be available during America’s waking hours and deal with one unhappy customer after another all day long.
I keep that image in mind so that I remember that whatever small problem I’m having is probably not a big problem.
I guess I try to be a decent human being. I also avoid the remote possibility of becoming the star of a viral video about customer service gone wrong.
11 minutes of learning
But this call dragged on: eleven minutes in total. Writing that now, it doesn’t seem super long, but at the time it felt like an eternity for something that should have been simple.
There was a noticeable delay on the line and not the best connection, and the customer service representative interrupted me several times, assuming he understood what I was asking and launching into long, off-topic explanations before I could finish.
Reflexively, I started talking to him the same way I did with ChatGPT:
- “Stop it. I didn’t ask you that.”
- “No. Listen to what I say before you answer.”
- “All I need from you are the following three things.”
Whole life stories
To be honest, I caught myself doing it pretty quickly. Plus, I probably overcompensated for the rest of the conversation.
In real life, it’s almost a cliché among people who know me that I talk to everyone and often walk away with their entire life story, simply because I find almost everyone interesting.
My wife, who was sitting next to me, as I read this part out loud to her: Mmmm-hmmm.
But at that point I had entered the mode I use with machines: efficient, blunt and completely indifferent to the experience of the other side.
Machines are not human; people are
I have purposely removed empathy from my interactions with AI. I think that makes sense. I want speed and clarity, not emotional intelligence.
Plus, the idea of it makes me uncomfortableblurring the boundaries between humans and machines.
But without thinking, I adopted that same way of communicating in a conversation with a real, living fellow human being.
When you train yourself to communicate efficiently with something artificial—something that never requires patience, kindness, or dignity, or to be treated with dignity, it’s easy to forget that most of the world still does.
And honestly: so do you.
—Bill Murphy Jr.
This article originally appeared on the sister site of Fast Company, Inc.com.
Inc. is the voice of the American entrepreneur. We inspire, inform, and document the most fascinating people in business: the risk-takers, the innovators, and the ultra-driven go-getters who represent the most dynamic force in the American economy.
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