The Olympic hockey tournament for team USA is going as planned so far. 3 pretty dominant wins against teams that the Americans should honestly beat by 3+ goals every time. One storyline in the background of team USA’s quest for gold, however, is the Hughes brothers, with brothers Jack and Quinn appearing together in red, white and blue for the first time at the Olympics (Luke will be there next time too, I’d bet 50 units on it). And through that, America and the world get to know this hockey superfamily.
What many people realize is that Jack is a pretty funny, quintessential athlete known for showing his personality (see examples below).
Meanwhile, his superstar (and perhaps the best of the three Hughes brothers), Quinn, seems to be a little less outgoing. A little less consistent, fortunately. It seems that even if the US upset Canada for gold, his facial expression would be exactly this.
The Morning Skate spoke with Quinn earlier today and walked him through some of these “seeing ghosts” moments to see what was going through his mind so that the NBC sports audience is no longer so worried about him.
TMS: During yesterday’s match against Denmark you seemed a bit strange on the bench. What happened there?
Quinn: Yeah, I totally understand people being concerned about that clip. Honestly, when I went to my local Planet Fitness last week when I walked in the front desk girl I’ve had a crush on since I joined two weeks ago, she said to me, “Go get a workout in,” and I told her “you too.” It’s been haunting my mind ever since. To be honest, I haven’t even slept since, I’ve just been drinking Italian espressos since we landed, hoping that will get me through the gold medal game against Canada once we beat all these minor league nations.
TMS: Totally understand Quinn, we’ve all been there. I do that every week in my gym. But this appears to be a longer-term problem. Here’s a video of you recently with the Wild. Was this a similar situation?
Quinn: No, that was actually completely different. There I vividly remember that game being the day my parents told me that my very first pet, a goldfish named Oliver, had not actually grown up and had swum to the ocean via the nearby creek, and that they actually forgot to feed him when I was staying with a friend for the night, so he died. I still haven’t spoken to them since.
TMS: That must have been tough Quinn. Losing one pet is worse than losing a human sometimes. But actually this has been going on for a long time. Like you’re here at the beginning of your career on the Canucks doing the same thing. Are you okay dude?
Quinn: So in those clips, I’m really just thinking about every wrong thing I’ve ever done and every mistake I’ve ever made and every mistake I’m ever going to make and how Josie McBride told me in fifth grade that she couldn’t date me anymore because my brother Jack was better at hockey than me. It’s my pre-shift ritual to get me in the right mindset to be the Grim Reaper on the blue line for the other team. Then, when I’m done with my shift, my thoughts immediately go back to last week’s Planet Fitness.
After this interview, all the lights in the room turned off and the Halo 3 theme song started playing. The TMS team immediately left, leaving Mr. Hughes to his activities. We will make no further comment at this time.
*This article is a work of satire and parody. It is not a real interview and is for entertainment purposes only.
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